Why I began…

I realized I never mentioned why I decided to start an online journal.

Well it began with Netflix. There is a show called ‘The Mortified Guide’. It is funny, inspirational, and interesting. I was introduced to the show by a good friend and thought about how it might make me feel better to possibly start a journal of my own. I never had a journal or saw the need for one because I was either a closed book or a diary for others. I am a secretive person. If you tell me not to say anything then I won’t. I’m so good that sometimes seconds after telling me something private I will forget it so I don’t let it slip. Maybe it is because I’m a guy but I like to call it a safety precaution.

The other thing that got me started was Google’s Blogger. I use to have a blog that I would post random thing on. The title of that blog is literally called RandomnessFirst. I know, very creative. I never actually took it seriously but it was a way to keep me busy so I enjoyed it. Not only that, I could customize it the way I thought it would look cool and get a lot of readers. The blog is not very big (roughly 36 post), it did not go worldwide with success, and the content is probably not good but it served its purpose. As far as the content on the blog, it goes from PC parts and builds to me gaming. I tried to incorporate conspiracy into it but after reading what I had, I decided to take them down. It was kind of strange for what I had envisioned even though I never actually had a vision.

My feelings are a big part. Strangely I am a bit lost in my little world. I am like many others out there confused as to what my purpose is on this planet. I am in my mid 20s but feel like a 40-year-old without direction. I have had and currently have many opportunities but cannot seem to grasp onto them. It is as if the drive and motivation have left my body. Similar to when the alien minions in ‘Space Jam‘ steal the talents of NBAs finest players. I know what I need to do but I have the hand of fear holding me down. Fear to fail, let down my loved ones, and myself. I am certain that many other feel the same so I decided to write about my days as a way to push through it. Writing might even be a distraction to my day but I believe it has great potential to help me keep moving.

So, I will write when I can.

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